Cafe Victoria

A story about resilience.

The idea of if you could do anything came to me straight of out of left field when I became a stay at home mom with newborn twins. As crazy as that might sound, it was the first time in my life where I felt my future was a blank slate. You might be thinking “staying home with twins, yeah that would close a lot of doors”, but you know what, you would be amazed what comes to mind when you have to start over.

In a time where we quickly text or voice record a message to send, and spend just enough time on Facebook to “like” someone’s status or new photo, are we really too busy to pick up the phone?

I sat there. Counting how many friends I have on my Facebook page and thought, there has to be at least one person I can call. Someone with whom I can have a real conversation. Yes, it is easy to scroll through the newsfeed, to share a bit of my own life, and then turn off the phone. Yet after a few days of this, a few days of minimal conversation with my husband, I’m left wondering, are we really too busy to talk on the phone?

Last month, I asked my mom friends about their favorite part of being a mom. The running theme that emerged from their answers was over-the-top hugs. This time around, for Fathers Day, I found that the dad response carried a huge amount of pride for being their childrens’ dad. These dads reflected on how important it is that who they are to their child matters and what their child teaches and gives back to them.

What is your favorite part of being a mom? Mine has to be the hugs. Hugs, hugs, hugs!

There are the I love you mommy hugs. The I’m so glad you are here mom, what are we doing now hugs. The I want only mom hugs that are really tight and pull at your heart strings. Oh and the She is my mommy – No my mommy! hugs. Those ones need all the hugs space you can give.

A Facebook entry I wrote to my twin club during a evening my twins would not fall asleep

The sooner I accept this stage the easier it will get. Repeat. Repeat. It’s the only thing that seems the most positive, the most realistic, other wise I’ll keep thinking about all the things I don’t get to do and will join in the crying that has been happening every night this week while we try to get them to bed. The sooner I accept that I can’t get everything done that I wanted to do because it’s just the way it is right now, the sooner I’ll feel less anger, less sadness, less frustration.

Seven stay-at-home parents share what they love about their work and the biggest challenges they face.

“Today I understand vocation quite differently – not as a goal to be achieved but as a gift to be received.” Parker Palmer, Let Your Life Speak

With Labor Day upon us, Americans are about to take that final summer vacation, host their annual BBQ, and toast to the amazing gift of work we get to do everyday to keep our country thriving. Maybe you are fulfilled in your career and could not even imagine leaving. Maybe you are searching for a new field or purpose, or are feeling burned out. Or maybe you are a recent parent and wondering what it would be like to stay home with your child or children?

It’s tax season. You’ve either finished yours, doing them right now or thinking to yourself “I better get on that, fast!” It is also the time in the year where you reflect on the work you did, where you made big changes (kids, marriage, divorce, homes), and how you did financially. As I sat with our new tax person, with all our stuff organized, I remembered that my financial contribution was only going to be $5.00.

First published on November 28, 2014 on Twiniversity.com

It’s Wednesday. The girls are looking at me, looking for something to do. On Saturday, they turn sweet 16 months. I’m looking back at them. “Now what?” They have torn my house apart. My days have turned into weeks. My exercise has turned into me bending down to pick up a toy, a sock, a piece of food all through the day. I’ve got to find us something to do or I will be cleaning for the rest of my life.

“Now you are more likely to have less time home before returning to work than you did before.” – A close friend

After discussing the right amount of expresso for my cappuccino with the barista, finding the most comfortable seat at my local Starbucks (I moved three times) I begin to write. I made my little to-do list of what I want to achieve before I head back to the house: 1. Write this blog post. 2. Write the first draft of my cover/resume.

I used to love my job. Now I love my life.

When I was working, I had my son, my husband and our dreams of owning a home. I loved working with my students. I found great joy being on a college campus. Yet, when I arrived home, I didn’t realize I had given all my energy to my work. Thinking work was what fueled me.